VIP Club

Duct Tape Dave's Blog

David Kious is one of the funniest feature comedians currently touring the Midwest. After years of performing improv, theatre and radio, David has packed up his life experiences and taken them on the road. He talks about relationships, college, country music and, of course, his cats.

David can bring his clean show for corporate and family-friendly events. And he can always get rowdy when requested. He has opened for many national acts, including Jimmy "Dy-No-Mite" Walker, Weird Al Yankovic, Blake Clark and Tim Cavanaugh.

David's been thrown out of some of the best clubs in America:

The Improv . Kansas City, Missouri
Stanford's Comedy House Kansas City, Missouri
Stanford's Comedy House Overland Park, Kansas
The Comedy Club Denver, Colorado
Wit's End Westminster, Colorado
The Funny Bone Des Moines, Iowa
Star City Cafe Lincoln, Nebraska
Noodles Comedy Club Des Moines, Iowa
U.S. Army Ft. Leavenworth, Kansas
ComedyCity Kansas City, Missouri
Bowinkles Sports Bar & Grill Manhattan, Kansas
Fat Tuesdays Eureka Springs, Arkansas
Crockey's Branson, Missouri
Deloitte & Touche Kansas City, Missouri
Pepperoni's Sioux City, Iowa
ReMax Realtors Kansas City, Missouri
Sam's Wholesale Club Kansas City, Missouri
J.D. Reece Kansas City, Missouri
The End Zone Elk City, Oklahoma
Rancher Spirits & Billiards Jackson, Wyoming
Radisson Hotel Odessa, Texas
Sénor Pepper's Farmington, New Mexico
Bullfrogs Live Topeka, Kansas

"Support Laughter, Kiss a Comedian"

Book Dave for one of your events: davidstandup.com!
 

by Dave posted Nov 12 2015 10:00AM
 

If you're a straight man who thinks it's bad enough that women in nightclubs are judging your looks, it might make you pee shy to find they're judging your junk in the bathroom, too.

At Foundry Nightclub at the Dinn Ri Hotel complex in County Carlow, Ireland, a bathroom display shows pictures of women standing in front of urinals, looking down in a way that indicates they're judging the user's penis size.

One woman holds a tape measure, anxious to measure, while another, older-looking woman looks utterly shocked.

Yet another woman holds up a magnifying glass.

Originally shared by user barrell125, whose real name is Conor Farrell, the image's corresponding Reddit thread now has more than 800 comments. 

"Why is grandma looking forward? All I can imagine is a 12-foot-tall man with a penis that hangs to the floor," user Pee_Earl_Grey_Hot posted in a comment that has been up-voted more than 1100 times.

"I know I'd go to the old lady with the shocked face. She's probably seen all kinds of shit in her life and if you can shock her with your penis size you KNOW you've got a monster," Reddit user Nixposion added to that thread.

"Statistically there should be one who is unimpressed," user hot4you11 posted.

The Foundry bills itself as "one of Europe's most sophisticated clubs," thereby setting a low bar for sophistication across the continent.

by Zeke Q104 posted Nov 12 2015 9:55AM
The Top 5 Surprising Facts About the Egyptian Pyramids

5.  Their financing once fell apart after it was exposed to be a pyramid scheme.

4.  Pharaohs buried in the tallest pyramids had the least-satisfied wives.

3.  Their builders laid so many bricks they were made honorary Lakers.

2.  The Arabic word for pyramid roughly translates to "Desert Nipple"

1.  The Great Sphinx is considered an engineering marvel...same goes for Kate Upton's bra.
Filed Under :
Topics : Human Interest
People : Kate Upton
by Dave Kious posted Oct 4 2015 7:55PM
I've got two chances for you to win a 4-Pack of tickets to Jerrod Niemann at Whiskey Tango of Friday, October 16.

Please keep listening for your chances to win.

Also, a BIG congrats to our KC Royals for finishing with the best record in the American League.

Bring on Thursday!

Dave
 
by Dave Kious posted Sep 27 2015 7:58PM
Happy Sunday...What a beautiful day the Royals combined for a shutout win...Yes!

And you have two chances tonight to win 4 tickets to Jerrod Nieman on October 16 at Whiskiy Tango, PLUS

Family 4 pack of tickets to the LibertyCorn Maze going on now through October 31.

All that could be yours tonight!!!

Please keep listening for a chance to win.

Dave
Filed Under :
People : Jerrod Nieman
by Dave Kious posted Sep 20 2015 8:00PM
Happy Sunday Night to y'all.

Royals won today...And that's all I'm going to talk sports for the time being.  :-P

But, tonight, I'm giving you 2 chances to win a Family Four-Pack of tickets to B & B Theatres which includes popcorn and a drink.

Good luck,
Dave
 
Filed Under :
by Dave Kious posted Sep 7 2015 10:06AM
Happy Labor Day...Hopefully the rain will leave soon.

All kinds of prizes today including American Royal BBQ and Big & Rich tickets.

And Go Royals!!!!

Duct Tape Dave
by Dave Kious posted Sep 5 2015 5:01PM

Happy Labor Day Weekend to you!

You have 3 chances between now and 8pm to win some BBQ passses and see Big and Rich on October 3.

Keep listening for you chance to win...And Go Royals!

Duct Tape Dave

Filed Under :
Topics : Human InterestSports
by Dave Kious posted Aug 23 2015 12:25PM
Happy Sunday to you all...

Have 4 chances this afternoon to win a pair of tickets to Thompson Square at Whiskey Tango for this Friday AND we will throw in a pair of tickets to our Q-104 Mystery Show at Power & Light on September 3.

Great win for the Royals last night, even though it did get a little scary in the bottom of the 9th.  Chance to split the series this afternoon...Go Royals!

Keep listening for your chances to win.

Dave
by Dave Kious posted Aug 22 2015 1:18PM
Happy Saturday Afternoon to You!

Four chances this afternoon to win a pair of tickets to see Thompson Square at Whiskey Tango on Friday, August 28 AND I'll throw in a pair of tickets to the Q-104 Mystery Show @ Power & Light on September 3.

Nice win by the Chiefs last nighta and Go Royals and Go Sporting!

Dave
Filed Under :
Topics : Human InterestSports
by Dave Kious posted Aug 16 2015 7:59PM
Yes, three chances tonight to win a pair of tickets to see Little Big Town, David Nail and Ashley Monroe.

Please keep listening for your chance to win.

Last night...Crazy night in KC...Big win for the Royals, the Chiefs cameback and won on the road and Sporting KC was WAY down and came back to win...Too much fun.

Hopefully the Royals can take 3 our of 4 against the Angels.

Have a great Sunday night,
Dave  a.k.a.  Duct Tape Dave
by Dave Kious posted Aug 15 2015 5:13PM
Before 6pm tonight, your chance to win a pair of tickets to Yallapalooza 2015.

Also, listen next week for a HUGE announcement about a Big & Rich concert in KC.

In the meantime, Go Royals!  Go Chiefs and Go Sporting!

Have a great weekend,
Dave
 
Filed Under :
by Dave Kious posted Aug 9 2015 8:04PM
Happy Sunday night to you all!

I've got 3 chances for you tonight to win a pair of tickets to see Thompson Square at Whiskey Tango on Friday, August 28.

And what a great sweep by the Royals!!!

I was there on Friday night, so yea, I kind of got all of that started.  :-)

Please keep listening for a chance to win...Dave
 
Filed Under :
by Dave Kious posted Aug 8 2015 1:05PM
Happy Saturday!

Four chances this afternoon to win a pair of tickets to Thompson Square at Whiskey Tango on Friday, August 28, PLUS we will throw in Michael Ray's Debut CD.

I got to go to the Royals game last night...So much fun...Hope they can beat the White Sox again this evening.

They just cancelled the Excessive Heat Warning, but it 's still hot out there.

Have a good weekend,
Dave
Filed Under :
by Dave Kious posted Aug 2 2015 12:23PM

So, for those of you that got to go to Kenny and Jason last night...Have you recovered, yet?

Everyone says it was so much fun and...a little hot out there.

Well, stay in the A/C and listen for your chances to win a pair of tickets to Aaron Lewis with Travis Marvin at Whiskey Tango this coming Friday night.

Four chances to win this afternoon...Good luck!
Dave

Filed Under :
Topics : Sports
by Josh James posted Jul 20 2015 10:42AM
My brother-in-law is getting married next month, and I wasn't asked to be in the bridal party.

Not until Saturday night anyway, when his fiancee sent me a text message.

This is what it said:  "Hey! I'm working on some wedding stuff right now. Would you like to be a bridesmaid? I would have asked you before, but the bridal party would have been too big,"

Apparently one of her bridesmaids is really sick, and had to drop out of being in the bridal party. So basically I'm a "backup bridesmaid."

Should I tell her yes? Do I have the right to be annoyed that I'm clearly a backup, and she waited this long to ask me?

Delia, 27

(When were you someone else's "backup plan?" Did it make you mad, or did you just roll with it?)
by Josh James posted Jul 20 2015 10:30AM
I think this woman regrets her life choices AND her artistic choices.

A woman in Manhattan had sex with a guy several months ago... they got-it-on three times, then she never heard from him again. And apparently she doesn't even remember his NAME.

Which is a problem. Because it turns out he got her pregnant... and now she's trying to find him. So last week, she posted in the "Missed Connections" section on Craigslist.

Quote, "I am Mexican-American, 5-foot-4, 100 pounds when we screwed. You told me you were a business entrepreneur. You are Middle Eastern, tallish. Had about six-and-a-half inch [junk]. We had sex three times, then you disappeared."

Just to be sure, she also included a drawing of his face...and it's hilariously bad. She says, quote, "I think the resemblance is there." But we're pretty sure she's wrong. 


We're not sure if she found him or not, but she wound up deleting the post from Craigslist.
by Dave Kious posted Jul 18 2015 5:01PM
Happy Saturday to you...Please stay cool.

I've got a chance this hour for you to win a pair of tickets to Aaron Lewis on August 7 and a pair of tickets to Thompson Square on August 28 all at Whiskey Tango.

And it's all brought to you by Capital Federal.

Good luck...And Go Royals!
Dave
Filed Under :
Topics : Sports
People : Aaron Lewis
by Dave Kious posted Jul 12 2015 8:01PM
Happy Sunday Night!

Ok, two chances tonight to win a pair of tickets to Aaron Lewis, Big Smo & Thompson Square at Whiskey Tango, PLUS we will throw in a 4-pack of tickets to the T-Bones.

But...You gotta listen for a chance to win...Good luck!

P.S.  Please be careful out there...A heat advisory remains in effect.  :-P

Dave
Filed Under :
Topics : Sports
People : Aaron Lewis
by Dave Kious posted Jul 11 2015 5:27PM
Happy Saturday...Before 6pm, you have a chance to win...

A pair of tickets to Aaron Lewis, Big Smo, Thompson Square AND a 4-pack of tix to The T-Bones!

Keep listening for a chance to win!

Dave
Filed Under :
Topics : Sports
People : Aaron Lewis
by Dave Kious posted Jul 5 2015 12:01PM
Happy Sunday to you, hope you had a good Fourth.

Yes, I've got 4 chances this afternoon for you to win Thompson Square tickets at Whiskey Tango on Friday, August 28.

Also...Come on, Royals!  We REALLY need this one today.  Need to the get bats to wake up.

Thanks for listening,
Dave
Filed Under :
Topics : Human InterestSports
by Dave Kious posted Jul 4 2015 1:25PM
Happy Saturday, Happy Fourth of July and Happy Chance to Win Thompson Square Tickets @ Whiskey Tango on Friday, August 28.

Ironcially you have FOUR chances to win with me this afternoon.

Good luck and be safe out there.

Duct Tape Dave
Filed Under :
Topics : Sports
by Josh James posted Jun 30 2015 10:54AM
156 years ago... in 1859, five thousand people gathered to watch Frenchman Charles Blondin walk across NIAGARA FALLS on a TIGHTROPE. It took him only five minutes. Later, he crossed blindfolded on stilts, pushing a wheelbarrow, and while carrying a man on his back!

116 years ago... in 1899, Charles Murphy became the first person to reach 60 MPH ON A BIKE!

79 years ago... In 1936, Margaret Mitchell's classic novel, "Gone With The Wind," was published.

40 years ago... In 1976, CHER and GREGG ALLMAN were married only four days after Cher divorced SONNY BONO. Cher and Gregg Allman split up nine days later, before eventually getting back together. Sonny skied into a tree and died 23 years later.

39 years ago... in 1976, Police raided NEIL DIAMOND'S home. They didn't find enough marijuana for an arrest, but left with some free albums.

38 years ago... in 1977, GENE SIMMONS authorized the first KISS COMIC BOOK. It sold 500,000 copies. Did you know: the red ink was mixed with small amounts of blood from each group member.

29 years ago... in 1986, in a 5-4 decision, the Supreme Court ruled that states COULD OUTLAW HOMOSEXUAL ACTS between consenting adults. That ruling was overturned in 2003... when the court decided that what you do in the privacy of your lover's reckty is YOUR business.

27 years ago... in 1988, RONALD REAGAN instituted random drug testing for all White House employees after three guards were suspended for off-duty use of the NOSE CANDY.

22 years ago... 
in 1993, "SPANKY" MCFARLAND of the "Little Rascals"  died in Texas, at 64

21 years ago... in 1994, STONE GOSSARD and JEFF AMENT of PEARL JAM testified at a congressional hearing concerning rising concert ticket prices. EFF TICKETMASTER!

9 years ago... in 2006, JESSICA SIMPSON divorced what was left of NICK LACHEY, after nearly four years of marriage. Remember when we wondered what the hell Nick was doing with her? Well, now that we know she's SEXUAL NAPALM, it all makes sense. 
by Dave Kious posted Jun 28 2015 7:42PM
What a weekend it has been...
The Kicker Country Stampede was another HUGE success...The Rolling Stones rocked Arrowhead Stadium, sure they're not a country band, but we all love the Stones.

Sporting KC won another home game and The Royals...What can I say about the Royals?
They swept Oakland on the road...Yes!

Last, but certainly not least...Tonight I have chances for you to win either Aaron Lewis or T-Bones tickets.
Please keep listening for details and YOUR chance to win.

If you need me, I'll be in the studio smiling.  :-)

Duct Tape Dave
 
Filed Under :
Location : Oakland
People : Aaron Lewis
by Dave Kious posted Jun 27 2015 5:02PM
Happy Saturday to you!

Country Stampede going on...Rolling Stones at Arrowhead and Sporting KC playing tonight.

AND...I've got a 4 pack of tickets to giveaway to Aaron Lewis with Travis Marvin at Whiskey Tango on August 7th that I'll be giving away during the 5 o'clock hour.

AND...During the 6 o'clock hour you have a chance to win a 4 pack of T-Bones tickets for their July 7th game.

Keep listening for your chances to win!

Duct Tape Dave
Filed Under :
Topics : Sports
by Josh James posted Jun 24 2015 8:03AM


Here are some random facts for you....

1. Mexico's official name is actually United Mexican States.


2. Missing kids aren't on milk cartons anymore  because the program was a huge failure. Only about 70 missing children were ever featured on milk cartons in the U.S.... and only one was found alive..


3. Only one Adam Sandler film has ever gotten an Oscar nomination. "Click" was nominated for Best Makeup in 2006, but lost to "Pan's Labyrinth"


4. The average American fast food worker is now 29-and-a-half years old.


5. Phosphorus was accidentally discovered in the 1660s by a guy who was boiling his PEE to turn it into gold...


 
Filed Under :
People : Adam Sandler
by Dave Kious posted Jun 21 2015 12:18PM
Happy Father's Day!

Chance to win Stampede or Lady A tickets all afternoon, so please keep listening for a chance to win.

How about that Royals win last night?  Hope they can take 2 our of 3 against Boston.

Thanks for listening,
Duct Tape Dave
Filed Under :
Location : Boston
by Dave Kious posted Jun 20 2015 5:05PM
Check this out...You have a chance to win either Lady A or Country Stampede tickets.

I've got 3 giveways between now and 8pm tonight....So...

PLEASE KEEP LISTENING!!!

Good luck...Duct Tape Dave
 
Filed Under :
by Dave Kious posted Jun 14 2015 7:59PM
Happy Sunday Night to You...

Duct Tape Dave here and you have 2 chances tonight to win tickets to see Aaron Lewis and Travis Marvin @ Whiskey Tango on Friday, August 7.

Please keep listening for you your chance to win.

And let's hope the Royals get back to winning again.  :-(

Best wishes,
DTD
by Dave Kious posted Jun 13 2015 5:13PM
Happy Saturday Night!

Chance to win Aaron Lewis and Travis Marvin tickets at Whiskey Tango is happening this evening.

Just listen for the announcer guy to tell you when to call...Good luck!

Duct Tape Dave
Filed Under :
by Dave Kious posted Jun 7 2015 12:01PM
Happy Sunday to you...And let's get those Royals winning again!

The good news is that as bad as they are playing, there are still only one game out of first place.

So, come on Boys in Blue...Let's win today!

Oh, and back to Q-0104. 

I've got chances for you to win Aaron Rogers tickets (With T-Marv) or Randy Rogers Band tickets.

Be safe out there,

Duct Tape Dave
On Air  Now
Middays with Ali Stephens
9am - 2pm
Next Up: Joshua James
Q On-Demand
Local Forecast
Recent Post
Man walking behind truck disappears in sinkhole
FBI Arrests Nearly Every Single Elected Official in a Small Texas Town
The Morning Drive's Top 5 List for 2/8/2016
This Taco Bell LASAGNA Cost Me $80 And Was Worth Every Last Penny -
URINE COCKTAIL GUIDE OFFERS 25 ALCOHOL-FREE RECIPES
Tag Cloud
Blog Categories
Blog Archives